Today’s my 33rd birthday. Yes, I am aware that I’m past retirement age by Internet standards. I’m awaiting the stone in my hand to start flashing to carry me away to the after-world of Facebook any moment now.

Until then, here’s the super mature, appropriate for my age playlist I’ll be jamming out to all day.

As is tradition, the rest of the day is spent listening to atmospheric horror scoring. The choice is up to you. I typically lean heavily into Midnight Syndicate, though film or game soundtracks are totally appropriate. The Witch got heavy play last year and seems likely to dominate again today. Dig those crazy beats.